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Gavin HamnettMS, LMHC
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Back home, and twelve years old again

Individual therapy for adults in New York who dread holidays and come home from family visits exhausted.

Request a free consultation
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Who This Is For

You are a capable adult. You run a business, lead a team, or hold your own household together. Then you walk into your parents' kitchen, and within an hour you are sulking, people pleasing, or biting your tongue the way you did as a teenager.

This is very common, and it makes sense. Families tend to pull us back into the roles we learned there. The drained feeling afterward is often the cost of squeezing yourself into an old shape for a few days.

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What We Work On

  • Old roles

    The peacemaker, the responsible one, or the black sheep, showing up right on cue.

  • Dread before visits

    Tension that starts days before you get in the car.

  • The aftermath

    Exhaustion, irritability, or a depressed mood that lingers once you are home.

  • Boundaries

    Saying no, leaving early, or skipping a gathering without guilt taking over.

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How I Work With Family Patterns

I work with individuals, so this is about your side of things. With Hakomi, we slow down and notice what happens in your body when you picture walking in the door. Shoulders rise, the stomach tightens, the voice goes quiet. Those reactions are old, and they make sense.

Psychodynamic work helps us see the role you took on and why it once kept you safe. When you can feel the pull starting, you get a choice about whether to follow it. The aim is to show up as the adult you are now, even at the holiday table.

More about my approach
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What Sessions Look Like

  1. A free phone call

    20 minutes to talk about what happens when you go home and whether I am a good fit.

  2. Individual sessions

    55 minutes, weekly or every two weeks, in Rhinebeck, Hudson, or by telehealth in New York.

  3. Before and after visits

    We can plan what you want to try ahead of a holiday, then look at how it went, without judging yourself for what slipped.

What Can Shift

You can't choose your family, and you don't have to cut them off to feel better around them. What I hope for is that you come back from the next visit tired in the ordinary way, still feeling like yourself. Maybe you even find parts of the visit you can enjoy.

Rates in Brief

Sessions are $160 for 55 minutes. The first step is a complimentary 20 minute phone consultation.

Rates
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Questions People Ask

Do you offer family therapy?

I offer individual therapy for adults. We can talk about whether that fits the support you are seeking. You work on your part of the relationship with me, and that alone can change how visits feel.

Should I stop seeing my family?

That is your decision, and we won't rush it. There is often a lot of room between going along with everything and cutting contact.

Can we work on this around a specific holiday?

Yes. Starting a few weeks ahead gives us time to prepare, and to look back together once the visit is over.

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Start With a Free Consultation

Send me a short message and I'll set up a free 20 minute phone call.

Request a free consultation (845) 532-8336