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Gavin HamnettMS, LMHC
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Old hurts don't have to run things

Therapy for adults in New York whose early experiences still shape how they feel about themselves today.

Request a free consultation
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Who This Is For

Some of what happened when you were small is still making decisions for you. Someone raises their voice in a meeting and you feel eight years old. A partner goes quiet and you scramble to smooth it over. You know you are an adult. Something older doesn't seem to.

I work with adults whose early experiences still shape how they see themselves. Sometimes that was something dramatic. Often it was a quieter kind of hurt: not being noticed, having to be the easy child, being praised only for getting things right. Many have talked about their childhood in therapy before and understand it well. They still feel it.

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Where Old Hurts Show Up

  • Harsh self talk

    An inner voice that sounds a lot like someone from long ago.

  • Bracing

    Waiting for criticism or rejection, even when things are going well.

  • People pleasing

    Reading the room before you know what you want yourself.

  • Family visits

    Leaving a holiday weekend feeling smaller than when you arrived.

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How I Work With Early Hurts

I hold a simple belief about this. The Self you were born with is not wounded. What happened pulled you away from it, and you learned ways to cope that made sense at the time. Our work isn't to repair you. It is to help you find your way back to what was there all along, what I call the Organic Self.

Psychodynamic work helps us understand where the old patterns came from. Hakomi lets us meet them gently in the present, through what you notice in your body when an old feeling stirs. We go slowly, and you stay in charge of how close we get to anything painful.

More about my approach
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What Sessions Look Like

  1. A free phone call

    We start with a complimentary 20 minute phone consultation. You don't need to share your history on that call.

  2. A steady place

    55 minute sessions, weekly or every two weeks, in Rhinebeck, Hudson, or by telehealth in New York State.

  3. At your pace

    We only go as far as feels manageable, and we leave time to come back to the present before each session ends.

What Can Shift

Every child deserves to feel at home in themselves. Many of us didn't get that. What I hope for is that the people I work with can finally feel it as adults, and say it without effort.

If something old is still running the show, a free 20 minute phone consultation is a quiet way to begin.

"It's good to be me."

Rates in Brief

Sessions are $160 for 55 minutes. The first step is a complimentary 20 minute phone consultation.

Rates
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Questions People Ask

Do I have to talk about everything that happened?

No. We go at your pace, and much of the work happens in how things feel now, not in retelling every detail.

What if my childhood wasn't that bad?

You don't need a dramatic story. Quiet hurts can shape a person deeply, and they are worth attention.

I've already talked about this in therapy. What would be different?

Understanding a pattern and feeling free of it are two different things. Body based work brings in what you feel, not only what you know.

What if I am in crisis?

Please call or text 988, or call 911 right away. My practice does not provide emergency services.

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Psychodynamic Therapy

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Start With a Free Consultation

Send me a short message and I'll set up a free 20 minute phone call.

Request a free consultation (845) 532-8336